I will start with this lovely little gem I have been visiting for a couple of years…Koriente. The service is always friendly, spot on, beyond pleasant, and the food is nothing less than stellar. Each item is very fresh, made to order, no MSG, and delicious. On a “fat day” I normally lean towards the (amazing) miso soup and the hummus roll. On an evening when I need a good drinking base, I lean towards the Koriente Curry A. It’s absolutely perfect. The iced green tea is to-die-for, and I normally accompany my meal with a black tea and soy milk bubble tea. It’s so cute and fun. If you visit between 6pm and 9pm and order a meal, you get a choice of either a cup of miso soup OR green tea ice cream set atop crushed pistachios and drizzled with fresh honey. Holy shit…I’m hungry!

Best of all, the owners have completely transformed the building and vicinity with the most amazing gardens. Before and after pictures below. Go eat there. ASAP.

The next fabulous morsel on the list is a newly renovated, renamed, remodeled, re-everythinged Rio’s Brazilian Cafe on the east side at the intersection of E. 5th street and Pleasant Valley (Looks like Capital Metro has something positive going for them). It was a taco shack (and I mean that in all senses of the word) previously that advertised a $.79 breakfast taco. Um, I can’t even get anything from McDonald’s for that cheap…I stayed away. Much to my amusement and pleasure, I accepted a lunch invite to the new and improved venue from a friend last week. I enjoyed it thoroughly. While I am by no means a vegetarian I normally do eat veggie while I am dining outside of my home. Frankly, meat is scary…especially in “cultural” cuisine…that is, if you call it cultural.

I had to try as much as I could because that’s how Fat Mommy rolls. I started off with the Leblon salad. A concoction of epic porportions such as black-eyed peas, tomatoes, spinach, corn, peaches, apples and olives in a white wine vinaigrette. I then had the soy chorizo sausage empadao (equivalent to the more recognized empanada) and the spinach & ricotta pastel…also more or less an empanada. My dining pal had the cheese bread trio of which I sampled. They are indeed belly bombs in comaparison to the liter fare on le menu, but delightful none-the-less.

The interior, though small (at a meager 5 tables and a couch) is simply a charm to enjoy a deliscious and comfortable meal, and as soon as it ceases to rain up in this bitch, I plan to return and sit on the patio. Nothing like the exhaust from (Un) Pleasant Valley to glorify your delicious meal.

Anyways, just go…to both of these places. Trust me!

I actually am not a fan of Valentine’s Day. I believe that every day is a good day to love, nurture, and care for those near and dear to your heart. Being a good person on Valentine’s Day does not earn you any brownie points, my friend.

However, for the sake of this post, I will conform – just a bit.

To my fiance – You make me laugh. I never dreamed life could be so happy. You help me to make myself a better person and you encourage me to see all the beauty in the all world. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with you, and as I have always said, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me.  If I had to do it all over again,  I most certainly would.  As a point of reference, I love you more than I love cheese!  It’s twue.

To my friends – You each show me strength in many many ways and encourage me to extend my horizons and erase my mental boundaries. You are all so talented and beautiful. I feel your warmth and love always, even when you are not near.

To my parents – a) I love you both very very much and am so thankful to have such caring, wonderful people in my life. b) Thank you endlessly for your eternal guidance and support. To know that there are at least two people in this world that believe in you 100% is precious.

To my brother – I am sorry that we no longer speak and I do hope that that changes someday. I always have and always will love you with all my being. I wish you only sunshine, peace and a happy heart.

To the Travel Channel – Thank you for picking up “No Reservations” when The Food Netword couldn’t hang.

I am one lucky girl – many hugs and kisses to you all – you each make up a part of who I am and who I aspire to be.

xoxoxoxoxox,

GBJ

I will begin by saying that I want to thank my mom for bringing me into this beautiful (mostly) world and my dad (really my step-dad, but he’s the only one that counts) for putting up with my bull shit for so long.  Both of you deserve major applause for this, what I am sure to be, one giant feat.

I am aquarius, but not through and through.  As my bday sits on the cusp of capricorn, I find that I resemble many of those traits as well.  However, I do admit to being a realist, seriously motivated, and a big giant bitch.  I’ll tell you like I think you should hear it, and I much pretty shut down on the recip!   

On my 27th bday all I did was cry.  (that was actually the day of my first enagagement…not exactly related…i dont think)  When I turned 30 I rejoiced.  They are “the” years, right?  And today, as I turn 29, I must say, I feel fabulous!  I have a life ahead of me that is filled with kindness, warmth, love, happiness, and excitement.  I am engaged to the amigo of my dreams and my friends and family are the fucking coolest people on this earth. 

Now, that was the sweet capricorn side of me…it’s time to let the aquarian in me weave some reality back into this world. 

On my way into the office this morning I picked up a copy of the latest US magazine.  Yes, I even read it in its entirety (it’s 10am).  Kate Gosselin says that she “hates” her $7k hair extensions.  Um, well yeah.  Why anyone would get them in the first place (minus Brittney – she needed them) is beyond me.  She thinks they look damaged and fried.  Yes, indeed they are.  IT’S FAKE HAIR, you silly honky!

Ok, next on the list is heiress Casey Johnson.  She died!  Her “several day-old” corpse was found in a friend’s home in LA on January 2, 2010.  The article explains that she lived a life of regret becasue she never broke into the industry as pals Paris, Nicole, and the likes.  She was however engaged to bi-sexual reality tv stat Tila Tequila for a hot minute.  Basically, what I am saying here is that, no…if your body is not found for several days after your death, and people are just now reading about it 19 days later…you were pretty far from fame.  Apparently you were so un-famous that your own friends and family didn’t realized you went AWOL.  Oopsie…maybe you can try again in the after-life.

Next, all I have to say is that I thinking about all of those in Haiti, what I am going to buy at the mall today, and most of all, how badly my hangover could be tomorrow. 

Cheers – Spread the love, kids…

GBJ

oy vei!  this place is one hot mess!  i have been waiting for a really long time to post about it because i felt really bad about what is about to go down in this post…sorry, simplicity, but you deserve it… 

me and my girl went there a little bit ago to check it out.  i had noticed it pop up in the hood, and i like to check out new frontiers…even if to merely mock them.  all the better.

concept is stellar, for the most part.  a fabulous selection of spanish and argentian wines (besos), and tapas that all ring in under $4.  sounds pretty right on, yeah?  so, we order – all tapas are served in 3-4 oz servings…which is enough for two to share – a few testers and get down to business.  the garbanzo bean thing?  NASTY.  it was cold.  the cheese plate?  yeah, anytime you set a piece of manchego in front of my pie hole, i’ll swoon.  however…everything was served on paper plates, with paper spoons (like those that come with the trial size blue bell things), and the presentation was simply atrocious at best.  i had to ask the wait person what the hell was up and she informed me that they use “corn” based plates and eating-ware as to conserve water (from not doing dishes) and therefore substantialize on the name “simplicity”.  i was semi beside myself.  i love the idea, but it’s simply not what i expect when i spend $50 on tapas and wine.  also, i began to think after we left…my wine glass was glass, and it needs to be washed.  does it not get washed?  not sure.  if you dare to go there after this post…please ask them and let me know.

simplicity…i tried to like you.  i tried to embrace you.  i really did.  you lost the battle…fair and square.

with a sad (but very green) heart,

GBJ

ps, on a lighter note: me and some homies are gonna try JUSTINE’S on wednesday.  a new little french bistro that opened up on the east side.  the menu looks heavenly, with an atmosphere to boot.  i’ll let you know how it goes.

here, look…yum, huh?  Justine‘s

The “old” Kate Gosselin had a pretty awful, yet coveted, do…

After eight little fuckers and a (much needed) divorce from her (Ed Hardy, Micheal Lohan – admiring), ex…Kate has managed to re-invent herself. Yes, she looks better, but no, if my ex-husband ever dated someone younger than myself, I would never try to copy her hairstyle…you’ve crossed the line, sister.

Thanks to a very genuine Dave…I will keep up my writing. I was never under the impression that anyone ever read or gave a shit about the jargon swirling around in my noggy-noggin…xo Dave and Monica (hope i can measure up)

Alrightie kids!  Happy 2010…I am going to go ahead and let you all in on my faves of 2009.  Following is a list of all things that kept me from doing any actual work this past year.  (What makes it even better, is I work for the public sector…hee hee) 

Best Blogs of 2009…

SoLikeYeah – These ladies have it goin on!  I am not only saying that because I know them and like them, but because they absolutely deserve it.  One of the best entries ever is their Fun Fun Fun fest antics.  Go read it now!

POST SECRET -   This gem is basically the car accident that you must stare at as you pass.  I really want to send something in, but I can’t think of anything nice to say, and my secrets really aren’t all that great. 

Texts From Last Night -  I know, old news.  I have actually already written about it myself.  It’s just a no-brainer.

Shit My Dad Says - You can also follow via Twitter…if you really do that.

Austin Surreal - One awesome son of a bitch reppin his town!

The CDs that I could not take off “repeat”…and no, they are not all new, but rather re-introduced.  Good music can do that. 

The Kingsbury Manx - Ascenseur Ouvert

The Gary - CHUB

The Great Nostalgic - self titled

Brother JT - Jelly Roll Gospel

The Clean - Mister POP

Baby Robots - Probably Portions and Fortunes

Start with these beauties, children…tomorrow will be a list of 2009 dislikes, and I will try to keep it positive.  TRY.

GBJ

sometimes all it takes is a little prodding.

let’s talk about new year’s resolutions for a second. i think that my boss has come up with an idea that i simply may be able to stick to. rather than proclaiming, “i will work out 5x/week this year”, she suggests that it’s best not to quantify, rather explain that you will simply work out “more”. i am a fan of working out, it’s just getting started that hurts the most. instead of getting off the couch last night, i was snug as bug watching iron chef and reading cooking lite. (obviously i am in love with food). dont take that wrong, i am by no means a lard-ass, i just enjoy delicious food.

anyways, it normally takes something of material value to get me into the gym after the holidays. That being a new pair of shoes, new workout clothes, a new music device (i already have an ipod with which i am very pleased), or perhaps something as simple as having amigo put new music on the ipod for me. although, he gets so into it, i am afraid that i may not actually get it back until NEXT year.

So, this year, i am coveting the new reebok genius shoes…anyone have them? it’s either that or rollerblades.

AND one more thing…can someone please put the bean burritos with sour cream (jamie london, wherever you are i blame you for this addiction) and mexi-melts with no meat on the taco bell drive through diet menu?  is that really too much to ask?

hope you all have a wonderful year, i promise to write “more”. 

GBJ

 

That’s right, I said. The national Amber Alert System should simply disappear or at least be revised. It’s a drain of public money, the giant billboards are distracting and ineffective, and they are a total eyesore.

To begin this conversation let me state that I do not have any children of my own. However, I firmly believe that if two adults cannot be responsible enough to raise a child without “stealing” it from one another, then chances are they have no business procreating in the first place. I actually think we all need to step back and consider this act, anyways. America’s children are fucked up and there is no denying it. The situation seems to be getting worse as the world becomes a more harsh place to survive. That’s another conversation.  I bring up responsible parenting with this issue because this system is largely used and abused by familial abductions conducted via irresponsible parenting and arguments/threats from one parent to the other.  Disgusting.

The Amber Alert system is categorized as follows; FA = familial abduction, NFA = non-familial abduction, LIM = Lost, Injured, or Missing, and ERU = Endangered Runaway. The National Budget for this system in 2008 was 15 million dollars and increases yearly as people “use” the system. In the 2008 reports, 100 Amber Alert (AA) cases were FA (meaning stolen by a family member), 70 were NFA (not family, but still known by the parent(s)), 21 were LIM, and 3 were ERU. It was later discovered that 11 of these cases were fraud and 14 were unfounded. Of these 194 cases, 40 children were successfully recovered as a direct result of the Amber Alert system…although I am not sure how they are proving this statistic. So basically, this means that the AA system sucesfully recovers less than 25% of its reported cases. If Obama successfully performed his job at a rate of less than 25%, he would get even less approval from the right than he already does. What I am saying is that a 25% success rate is a waste of time, money and support.

I arrived at this topic today because on my way into the office I was driving down the highway and realized that no billboard, especially an electric flashing one attempting to alert drivers, is a good idea. I would like to see the statistic on how many drivers nation-wide have been in accidents as a direct result of the AA billboards. I doubt that number exists anywhere.

I dont know about most drivers, but I know that I dont ever pay enough attention to those signs to make a difference. And if I did happen to see that trailer park Terry stole his little precious Ginger Mae from her mother Betty Sue, I am certainly not going to search for his beat up jallopy along my route. Please people…like I said, if you are not responsible enough to raise a child, don’t procreate. Perhaps I would not be so hard on this system if the only cases that were reported were legit and of actual kidnappings where the child is endangered. This is, afterall, how the Amber Alert was born.

Lastly, these signs are eyesores. Giant ones. Why cant the “concern” simply be braodcast over the radio? Seems a lot less expensive, far less distracting, potentially more effective because more people are forced to listen, and it certainly solves the eyesore problem.

I hate to offend, wait a second, no I dont.

Have a good day and enjoy that turkey!

GBJ

further your knowledge of this topic here and here.

i am aware that it has been a while since i have posted anything, and to be perfectly honest, i am not going to making any excuses. fuck you.

healthcare reform for the goddamn idiots out there…(and there are a lot of you)

first of all, what the hell is going on with the healthcare reform? why are the majority of the conservatives so against 96% of americans being covered? more so, why are they such giant idiots going on and on about how they dont want to pay for the poor’s healthcare and education?  why dont they see that they aleady pay for the rammifications of ill healthcare and a lack of education? it’s called wellfare, food stamps, and medicaid. i dont know, but it seems to me like if we just went ahead and got the naition healthy and educated, ‘merica just may be worth sticking around for. for real…GREEDY!

the legalization of marijuana!

this month’s texas monthly magazine has a wonderful article about marijuana. both its history and its future are touched upon, and there are some alarming statistics as well. i cannot say an exact number bc i dont have the magazine here with me, but i have been thinking about something that i read. ~ since the beginning of the war on drugs, there have been {approximately} 900,000 alcohol related deaths in the US. Not a single death has been reported by marijuana usage in all of its history on the planet. A human being would have to smoke {approximately} 200,000 joints in one sitting to die from toxic effects from weed. ummm, not gonna happen. what is the problem, america? the people that outlawed it in the first place were definitely not as educated as we are today. get with the times. legalize it, control it, and tax the shit out of it. watch our drinking and driving accidents and fatalities plummet and our national deficit decrease at an alarming speed. think about it, folks. the main reason it is not legal now is bc of all you misinformed conservative fucks and the pharaceutical companies! of course they dont want weed to be legal…it’s been used as medicine since the beginning of time. they are scared.

how white trash am i?  (i am not interested in your response)

i am hungry and lazy and dont want to go get anything for lunch so i just ate ruffles dipped in chick-fil-a buttermilk ranch sauce. the first bite was amazing, but now i just want to puke!

my crazy boyfriend came up with this new TLC program…

my folks think that their “emotional support” is enough to see me through life. come again, where the fuck did they get that bullshit from? i asked them to co-sign on a grad school loan for me, and they said they dont know any (in that loud and high-pitched judgemental voice she uses) parents who pay for their kids grad school. um, its obvious they dont understand what a loan is. i should have reminded them that they actually failed to pay for my undergraduate degree as well. its true. i am normally a very sweet daughter and i let them get away with far more than they should, but i had had enough of their shit yesterday and told em to go to hell and to find alternate plans for thanksgiving bc i dont want them at my house. my mom blamed me for “holding their denial to sign over their heads”…not true…i’m fucking pissed off and dont want to play the nicey nice game.

what happened to el nino

the weekend is here, when is it ever going to cool down for heavens sake? 80 degrees????? in november????? enough already!